Okay. I have been planning on getting a new phone cause the Virgin Cyclopes is a piece of crap and older than it really is which is about 5 years or more. I tried getting the new iPhone G3 S...but of course what always stops me is the Credit Game, aka don't have credit = no phone. So, my other option was the Blackberry Storm as I can get passed the credit game by paying $400 as a deposit, which I'm totally alright paying it to get a badass phone. As well as I think I'm worth it by now, I just have to wait at least two more paydays to have enough money for my bank credit card without going below 300 bucks. It's my goal to not go below that number no matter how desperate the time or times will be. I will not be discouraged by the Credit Game...I will overcome it and will play it like a genius. >:I

So, Riona (Tandy's friend from Canada) will be coming down next weekend, so this weekend we are cleaning the whole house! Dad, Collin, and Mom have to clean the basement mostly. I always get the kitchen and the laundry room, but today the living room is also one of my jobs. I won't be here during the weekdays as I have work, so I have to get as much done on my ends than Kay or Tandy as they don't have work.

That's all the biggies that have been going on. There are lots of other little things of course, but I have to get back to cleaning. ;)

Tell I Am A Dust Bunny, See Ya!
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P.S: Just so you can get a little excited about something I found out today. I went onto Youtube, went to CBAmericanSupport (http://www.youtube.com/user/CBAmericanSupport), scrolled down checking the new layout, and BOOM! There was my photo in the Friends list, Five to the first top. I was speechless, and bubbly all over! I switched my old photo for a new version, as I did for this one. I secretly hope that the boys of Cinema Bizarre may see my piccy...but again it's just a silly dream.

I've watched many love movies and have heard enough love songs to know what media says Love should be, look like, and perhaps should feel like. The movies, most but not all, are wrong. While the loves songs are mostly right. If that's how you think, then the media has corrupted your mind. Love us undefined, because it can't be defined. The word Love is a general term, because every Love is as infinitely different as the individuals walking this planet. Everyone's Love happens in odd places, in familiar places, and important of all it happens on a whim, or it can be nourished by friendship. I have been in love. I know what my love feels like. My love is deep as the ocean and has soft as cotton candy. When I look into my loves eyes I feel secure, I would do anything to make looking into those eyes last as long as I could, and to be held in those familiar arms that I know so well. My body knows the touch of my love, my body reacts just thinking about them as my heart beats faster with every in take of breath. I have known that this was the feeling, my feeling, of love. How my love should feel...but I also know how much Love can hurt. I thought I would be the one who would be the "Dumped", but rather I was the one who ended it. It was the hardest thing I have had to do in my life. My heart and mind where bickering and scratching at each other fighting over themselves. My heart saying "Your love is suppose to last for miles!" while my mind was screaming, "Look at yourself, your bruised and cut from the distance and you can't take much more of this!" My mind won out because in reality I couldn't take much more of the distance. I regret doing it, but not much as I thought I would. I went out with a lovely person who I have had a crush on for a long time, and had had a crush on me since the day she saw me. It was the beginning of my senior year when I met her. We instantly had things in common, yet we had our on taste on things. It was refreshing, but as the senior year ended and my past loves separated ways, so did all my friends. Their was only a few I could actually hang out with without being an outcast within the outcasts, but she was the one tie I had to them all. I loved her in a way I had never loved anyone else. On my birthday I think it was evident that something was happening, I wanted to get over this pain and start something new; to start over. We went out since my birthday up until less than a week ago. She's moving on in her life, and we both knew that we couldn't have a long distance relationship because both of us had difficult with that. As well as her life was taking a turn that meant she just couldn't handle having a relationship, and my mind totally understood where she was coming from, but my heart was alright the day it happened. Now my heart hurts, because my connection with my friends has let go....my last remaining friends have left me...now I'm left with my one and only best friend, David. Yes, there is one more, but that person isn't online enough to be there for me. I'm strong on the outside, but what's inside my caged heart is a tiger starving, dehydrated, and thunder-scared wanting a person to cling too for comfort. As this storm passes, I cry and yell for the person my heart so longs for, but sadly that person is too far away to hug me, say comforting words, and to make my fear fall away like the wings of a fallen angel. I am alone, again. I should be accustomed to these feelings, but I cry as my mind dips it's smooth pale fingers into the dark depths of my feelings, fears, and doubts making my heart reel with pain. It lasts only an hour, but within my mind it feels like an eternity. As for my every day activities. I go to work at 8ish and work tell 5 most days, except on Fridays I leave at 3. I get Sat and Sun off, and I have paid holidays. I am content with my life, but my mind and heart know that there is much more to be gained. This is enough for tonight.

Tell My Tears Drown My Heart, See Ya!
<3's

I always seem to start out with, "It's been a while," or some stupid thing like that well, screw it. I have been busy and I usually only use this site as an update site for my favorite bands...so poo on you. Though, right now I'm updating because I can...and I would like to share a video of me being a total dork, yet perhaps cute person.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PC3YeiRwhoM There is the link for you.

Leave comments, or not. I don't care, but I do really like getting them.

Seven long days before Bush is out of office. I can't wait. Even though Obama knows that all his plans are going to set us way back in the national debt, I think in his lifetime perhaps if everyone gets rid of all their personal debt we could get rid of half the national debt. So, yes it will be rough, but hopefully there will be lots more jobs for people. Those are my two cents on the matter.

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Lots of stuff to talk about!

I woke up this morning at 8 getting ready to venture into the world, meaning putting my mask on, aka make-up. I had to call the DMV place to ask a few questions about it, and a guy named Mike picked up. I asked him about the tests if I took D.Ed. He said that I didn't have too. I told him you just made me the happiest girl in the world, and that he took away my nervousness. He laughed, and told me what I needed to bring. Then we both hung up. Mom and I dropped off Collin at work, and headed to the DMV. We got there, and waited. I was still a little nervous, but when we got up there there was an African-American guy sitting and swiveled to see us. I gave him everything, and when he got to the address part of putting in, I gave him a state-whatever letter. He realized then that I was the girl who called. It was Mike! We laughed, and we did a few hand jabs. He called me a problem child after awhile of talking. I went over to the sight test, as I wear glasses. I grinned slightly seeing the numbers, and I asked "Are they suppose to be numbers?" He gave a shaky laugh, and replied back, "That isn't a good thing to say." I read him the 5th line quickly and easily, and headed back over there, he was still laughing. I just told him I'm making problems. He smiled, and after a few more laughs I got that flimsy paper ID. The picture was alright, I wish I just smiled a little, but I usually never smile in pictures anyway. So, it's okay I guess. Next Mom and I headed to get my Social Security Number card, as we have moved and can't find it. Both are going to be in my wallet in about one to three weeks.

The next thing that made today wonderful was that Baron is running and at least functional. He makes bad sounds though, because of the power steering, sounds like a dying stork mixed with a bad frog. It's really horrible, but at least it is in the driveway. I cleaned it after we brought it home, as well as cleaned the inside of it. It just needs to be vacuumed. As for things that need to be done with it to make it so I can freely drive it are these: new left rear tire, fix broken tail light, put new fluid in, and get it tagged for this state.

That is pretty much it, and it's only 4:40. What I day, and it's still going. Phew, physically I'm tired, but emotionally I'm high.

Tell The World Falls Into My Hands, See Ya!

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